Max Power sent me an email with this a link to "A Letter to Optimus Prime From His GEICO Auto Insurance Agent".
Mr. Prime, I am going to remind you again: Your policy with GEICO only reimburses you for accidents that occur while you are engaged in the reasonable use of your truck and trailer. As I told you when you originally purchased the policy, GEICO does not offer Megatron coverage, Starscream coverage, Soundwave coverage, Decepticon coverage, or Energon-blast coverage. Those are just not the types of damages we would expect from reasonable use.You know your world is fuck'd up when your friends, such as Kelmeister and Max Power, who have absolutely no vested interest in transforming gay robots, start sending you links throughout the day to gay robot content.
To sum up, GEICO has been unable to reimburse you for any repairs, but due to the high number of accidents you have been a party to this month, combined with the many accidents you have had in the preceding five months, your premium has increased to $235,567.50 per month. While that may seem like a lot, I remind you that it is a savings of $137 over Progressive and $98 over State Farm.
Then again, perhaps they are just bored at work and love me.