You were only waiting for this moment to be free.
Posted on January 14, 2009 9:58 AM
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So I was thinking... what would be a good scale for adult toy collecting psychological damage?
Of course, I've been thinking about it since this post.
So I'm proposing to the masses at large:
| Level | # of toys (any kind) | Appropriate Euphemism |
| 10 | 1001- | Total Lowlife Loser Douchebag Addict |
| 9 | 101-1000 | Asylum Worthy Loser |
| 8 | 91-100 | Putz |
| 7 | 71-90 | Don't you have real bills? |
| 6 | 51-70 | Get A Life |
| 5 | 31-50 | That Poor Loser |
| 4 | 21-30 | Sick Addict |
| 3 | 16-20 | Addict |
| 2 | 11-15 | Should Seek Medical Help |
| 1 | 6-10 | Acceptable Toy Collector |
| 0 | 1-5 | Barely Worth Acknowledging |
Think you don't have a problem and are offended by this list?
Thoughts? Edits?
Think there should be special interventions at the GRC?
Shit...I went from Putz to Asylum Worthy Loser in just the last year.
I hovered in the 71-90 mark for a couple years, and then...
*sigh*
...The Ultimate DOOM!!
(I figure if I'm an Asylum Worthy Loser, I'm fully permitted to make unabashed G1 cartoon episode allusions).
Well. These levels have not been officially accepted by any ISO standards bodies yet.
However, if you reach that level you are permitted to make any and all G1 allusions you wish.
Note though that as your level goes up you should also fully expect to be berated even more by others.
This is the price you pay.
I'm screwed anyways. I'm sure however I'm berated, I've been called worse.
Well, I have hit "that poor loser" status in my office alone. And those are the "acceptable collateral damage" items (with the exception of Grand Moff Muggs who is love).
Total lowlife loser douchebag addict. I win! I am (be)rated!
I'm That Poor Loser in 25th Anniversary Joes alone.
I'm probably Total Lowlife Loser Douchebag Addict if you add all my stuff up.
I'm Asylum Worthy Loser with Batman stuff.
Your chart is funny, but concerning. I appreacitate passion in many forms, including your hobby. You seem to want to mock yourself before others do. Those who give you crap for being passionate can buzz off. There is no need for you to join them in the ridicule preemptivly.
Hah! Now that's funny! Am I in need of an intervention then?
It has nothing to do with mocking. It has everything to do with not taking any of this shit seriously.
The day I take any of this toy collection shit seriously is the day I put a fucking bullet in my head.
Holy shit!
Even replying to that would indicate some sense of taking this seriously.
My god I need Jesus!
Oh man, I love how it just springs up there exponentially.
At least I'm not at the top level!
Ugh. So, I too am at "Total Lowlife Loser Douchebag Addict" but I have made great progress in moving down the ladder. I have ceased collecting multiple (infinite & expensive) lines.
Since "Asylum Worthy Loser" is such a large range, I'll be happy if I can get below half of that. Almost any one of my lines alone would put me at above the 101-level.
And who is DJ_Assface... I'm guessing someone in Cowtown, but probably not anyone we know. Unless it's JC. He obviously hasn't been reading this site for long.
JC? Jesus Christ?
OK, love the chart but i think something measuring the true psychological damage of toy collecting needs to be more detailed. and I'm not sold that Total Lowlife Loser Douchebag Addict covers that level of disorder well enough. also, what of us lame collectors who don't specialize in any one toy line or collect multiple lines, huh? we should get our own special short bus styled chart.
You just wait. The staff of Plasticcrack.com is coming with a whole special level for you! :-)
As someone with 75000 individual pieces of Lego, several TFs and countless SW figures, I've long given up trying to find a label for my level of geekiness/addict...
One label's enough for me, not that I like it!
M.
75000? Is that legal in the UK?
Well, it all amounts to just over 200 sets! Plus MOCs (My Own Creations) too... But yeah, it does seem a lot, especially in a small council house like mine! :oS
M.
How many do you need to be knighted?
How many do I need to be a "Nerd Addict Loser A-hole"?
Ya know... I wasn't thinking at all of you when doing this.
There's gotta be a subclass that includes hours spent in the library looking up 27 year old toy adverts!
And damnit...Nerd Addict Loser A-hole is what it is gonna be!